To Disagree Without Becoming Disagreeable

“Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24

Don’t be fearful of disagreement: Remember the slogan, "When two partners always agree, one of them is not necessary." Perhaps this disagreement is your opportunity to be corrected before you make a serious mistake.

Watch first reactions: Our first natural reaction in a disagreeable situation is to be defensive. Be careful. Keep calm and watch out for your first reaction. It may be you at your worst, not your best.

Be a good listener: Give the person disagreeing a chance to talk. Let them finish. Do not resist,defend or debate. This only raises barriers. Try to build bridges of understanding, not greater barriers of misunderstanding.

You may have some points in common: When you have heard your opponents out, dwell first on the points and areas on which you agree.

Be honest with yourself: Look for areas where you can admit error and say so. Apologize for your mistakes. It will ease the tension and reduce defensiveness.

Give yourself time to think over what is being said: It is much easier at this stage to agree to think about their points than rush forward and possibly miss opportunity for growth.

Be thankful that they care enough to disagree: Anyone who takes the time to disagree with you is interested in the same things you are. Think of them as people who really want to help you, and you may discover you are building lasting relationships.

Take no sudden action: Give yourself time to think through all points of disagreement and plan on meeting again. Restoration is God’s way.

If you are part of the problem, then you must be a part of the solution. Leaving smoking embers can create a burning infernal. Purpose to be at peace with man and God even if you cannot resolve all disagreements.

Pastor Mike

Proverbs 25:11 says, "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver."